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Almost everyone remembers the song ‘Don't Worry, Be Happy' by Bobby McFerrin. The song has a very catchy way of conveying its message of being happy to everyone. Bobby McFerrin's simple message surely made a lot of people happy by telling them not to worry. Years later, Pharrell Williams came out with another popular song ‘Happy’ which also encouraged people to be happy.
Living a happy, resilient and optimistic life is magnificent and is also good for your health. Being happy can actually protect you from the stresses of life. Stress is linked to the top causes of death such as heart disease, cancer, and stroke.
One of the most truthful things ever said is – “The only thing in life that is certain is change”, and in our life, we have the power to make the necessary changes if we want to. Even if we find ourselves in an unbearable situation we can always find comfort in the knowledge that it too will change. It's about being able to hang on through the storm because the strong winds will soon calm down.
Social networks or relationships are essential to happiness. People are different, accept people for who or what they are, avoid clashes, constant arguments, and let go of all kinds of resentments. Unfortunately, we sometimes spend too much energy trying to convert people into who we would like them to be. They have a right to be themselves. If arguments seem unavoidable, try and make an effort to understand the other point of view and you might just get along well with them.
Happiness is actually found in everyone, releasing it is a way to make life more wonderful and also healthier.
To be happy is relatively easy, just decide to be a happy person. Although happiness is more of a frame of mind, most of us have been conditioned to look to things and others to make us happy. The author Manda Hale says it best, "Happiness is an inside job. Don't assign anyone else or anything that much power over your life." The choice is yours, choose to be happy.
There are several ways by which you can do this.
Being grateful is a great attitude. Take a moment each day to express your gratitude. Even when situations don’t turn out the way you would have liked, be thankful that you still have an opportunity to make it better. Thank the people around you no matter how small their contribution because no one is obligated to do anything for us. Thank your loved ones, friends, and coworkers. And, most of all thank God for being alive.
The news is stressful. Take in less of it. Some people just can't start their day without a dose of news. Think about it, 99% of the news we hear or read is bad news. Don’t allow bad news to enter the first two hours of your day. Starting the day with bad news does not seem to be a sensible thing to do.
A spiritual connection is also recommended. Being engaged in spiritual activities such as singing, yoga, chanting, prayers, and meditations promote inner peace. Get grounded in happiness at the beginning of each day by participating in some type of spiritual upliftment.
Manage your time wisely. Time is invaluable and too important to waste. Time management can be viewed as a list of rules that involves scheduling, setting goals, creating lists of things to do and prioritizing. These are the core basics of time management that should be understood to develop an efficient personal time management system. However, it’s all for nothing if the use of your time doesn’t produce the results you desire.
Laugh and laugh heartily every day. Heard a good joke? Tell your friends or family about it, if it’s in good taste. As they also say -'Laughter is the best medicine'. A wise man once shared with me, “Find something to laugh about yourself every day.” We don’t have to take ourselves so seriously to take life seriously.
Express your feelings, affections, friendship, and passion to people around you. They will most likely return your actions. Try not to keep pent up anger of frustrations, this is bad for your health. Instead find ways of expressing them in a way that will not cause more injury, hurt to anyone or place you in a compromised position.
Working hard brings tremendous personal satisfaction. It gives a feeling of being capable to finish whatever you started. A sense of accomplishment is vital to our well-being, it gives meaning to our lives. Work on things that you feel has value.
Learning is a lifelong experience. We are either growing mentally or being left behind. Try and learn something new every day. Learning enables us to expand and broaden our horizons. And could also give us more opportunities in the future.
Maintain a personal physical fitness program. Run, jog, walk and do other things that your body was made for. Your program should consist of a combination of strengthening, endurance, and flexibility activities. The body wasn’t made to sit still and waste away. Feel alive.
Avoid exposure to negative elements like loud noises, music, toxins, and hazardous places or conversations. Being constantly engaged in negative environments or people has a way of bringing us down emotionally. If the situation does not contribute to your upliftment as a human being move away from it.
These are the few simple things you can do every day to be happy.
Remember this quote from Abraham Lincoln, he says, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." You have the power to be happy.
Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions. Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.
We don’t often think about the impact of positive thinking and our physical well-being. But research has proven that negative thinking can have an adverse impact on our health leading us to become overly stressed by the challenges of life and frequent feelings of being overwhelmed. This negative outlook then makes it even harder for us to bounce back from a setback and move forward.
Positive thinking enables us to take control of our own well-being in this time of constant daily stress. Despite this stress, we are expected to perform at our best and to be productive in all walks of life. While getting stress under control won't solve all our problems, the more we can reduce stress in our lives the more likely we are to find balance and reach our full potential. The following tips provide practical suggestions that you can use to help you reduce stress and shift into more positive thinking patterns:
Take Good Care of Yourself: It's much easier to be positive when you are eating well, exercising, and getting enough rest. If you don’t have one, establish a well-being program that you can manage daily. Start where you are.
Remind Yourself of the Things You Are Grateful For: Stresses and challenges don't seem quite as bad when you are constantly reminding yourself of the things that are right in life. Taking just 60 seconds a day to stop and appreciate the good things will make a huge difference.
Look for the Proof Instead of Making Assumptions: A fear of not being liked or accepted sometimes leads us to assume that we know what others are thinking, but our fears are usually not reality. If you have a fear that a friend or family member's bad mood is due to something you did, or that your co-workers are secretly gossiping about you when you turn your back, speak up and ask them. Don't waste time worrying that you did something wrong unless there is evidence of something to worry about.
Refrain from Using Absolutes : Have you ever told a love one "You're ALWAYS late!" or complained to a friend "You NEVER get it right!"? Thinking and speaking in absolutes like 'always' and 'never' makes the situation seem worse than it is, and programs your brain into believing that some certain people around you are incapable of coming through.
Detach from Negative Thoughts: Your thoughts can't hold any power over you if you don't judge them. If you notice yourself having a negative thought, detach from it, acknowledge it, and don't follow it. Only you can free your mind from negative thinking. Let it go!
Squash the "ANTs": In his book "Change Your Brain, Change Your Life," Dr. Daniel Amen talks about "ANTs" - Automatic Negative Thoughts. These are the bad thoughts that are usually reactionary, like "Those people are laughing, they must be talking about me," or "The boss wants to see me. It must be bad!" When you notice these thoughts, realize that they are nothing more than ANTs and squash them!
Practice Lovin', Touchin' & Squeezin' (Your Friends and Family): You don't have to be an expert to know the benefits of a good hug. Positive physical contact with friends, loved ones, and even pets, is an instant pick-me-up. One research study on this subject had a waitress touch some of her customers on the arm as she handed them their checks. She received higher tips from these customers than from the ones she didn't touch!
Increase Your Social Activity: By increasing social activity, you decrease loneliness. Surround yourself with healthy, happy people, and their positive energy will affect you in a positive way! Entertain in your home or become the social butterfly by extending invitations to go out with friends and family.
Volunteer for an Organization, or Help another Person: We all feel good after helping. You can volunteer your time, your money, or your resources. The more positive energy you put out into the world, the more you will receive in return.
Interrupt Patterns of Deep Reflections: If you find yourself constantly reflecting on a problem, a great way to stop it is to interrupt the thought pattern and force yourself to do something completely different. Deep reflection doesn’t always lead to an answer. It can be non-productive, because it's not rational or solution-oriented, it's just excessive worry. Try changing your physical surroundings - go for a walk or sit outside. You could also call a friend, pick up a book, or turn on some music.
Practicing techniques to maintain positive thinking enables us to focus on our strengths and accomplishments, which increases happiness and motivation. This, in turn, allows us to spend more time being productive, and less time feeling down and stuck.
Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions. Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.
Sometimes, when all our doubts, fears and insecurities get the best of us, we tend to come up with the idea of “I wish I was somebody else.” More often than not, we think and believe that someone or rather, most people are doing better than us. - when in reality, the fact is, most people are just as insecure as we are.
You spot what you consider a totally together person strutting around the room alone at a social event, casually sipping on a glass of what could be their favorite drink. You think to yourself, “he looks so perfectly calm and confident.” But if you could read thru their crystal-clear mind, you would see a cloud of thoughts and you might just be amazed at what he is thinking “are people talking about why I am coming here alone?... Why don’t people find me attractive? …I don’t like my eyes, they have too many wrinkles… I wish I was as intelligent as….” Similar thoughts may travel through your own mind.
We look at a successful business entrepreneur or entertainer and say “Woo… what else could they ask for?” She stares at the mirror and murmur to herself, “I hate my body… I wonder why my friends won’t talk to me… I hope mom and dad would still work things out.” Underneath the trimmings of success, they are dealing with personal insecurities just like the rest of us.
Isn’t it funny? We look at other people, envy them for looking so outrageously perfect and wish we could trade places with them, while they look at us and think of the same thing. We are insecure of other people who themselves are insecure of us. We often suffer from low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and lose hope in self-improvement because we are entrapped in quiet desperation.
Sometimes, you realize that you have an irritating habit like biting off your finger nails, having a foul mouth, talking too much, and you – of all people, is the last to know. Some of of us can be downright arrogant and intolerable.
One key to self-improvement is to LISTEN and TALK to a trusted friend. Find someone who you find comfort in discussing even the most mundane topics. Ask questions like “do you think I am ill-mannered?”, “Do I always sound so argumentative?”, “Do I talk too loud?”, “Does my breath smell?”, “Do I ever bore you when were together?”. In this way, the other person will obviously know that you are interested in the process of self-improvement. Lend them your ears for comments and criticisms and don’t respond with answers like “Don’t exaggerate! That’s just the way I am!” Open your mind and heart as well. And in return, you may want to provide your friend with constructive criticism that will also help them to improve themselves.
Do you remember Whitney Houston singing about, “Learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.”? True enough. To love others, you must love yourself too. You cannot give what you do not have. Self love is not about ego or self centeredness. It is the foundation for all other love in your life.
Before telling other people some ways on how to improve themselves, let them see that you yourself is a representation and a product of self-improvement. Self-improvement makes us better people, we then inspire other people, and then the rest of the world will follow. Recently, my 26-year-old son surprised me when he said, “mom and dad I don’t listen you, I observe what you do. Despite your challenges I see a lot of perseverance.” I really didn’t know he was watching us in this manner.
Stop thinking of yourself as second-rate being. Forget the recurring thought of “If only I was richer… if only I was thinner” and so on. Accepting your true self is the first step to self-improvement. We need to stop comparing ourselves to others only to find out at the end that we’ve got 10 more reasons to envy them.
We all have our insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We always wish we had better things, better features, better body parts, etc. But life need not to be perfect for us to be happy about ourselves. Self-improvement and loving yourself is not a matter of shouting to the whole world that you are perfect, and you are the best. It’s the goodness of acceptance and contentment. When we begin to improve ourselves, we then begin to feel contented and happy.
Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions. Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.
Are you one of those unhappy people because life hasn’t unfolded the way you would like? You see others around you enjoying the so call good life. All their hopes and dreams appear to come true, but you never seem to get a break. In spite of the daily hustle and grind, your dreams remain just that – dreams. Maybe it’s time to get up and do something different.
You cannot afford to sit around waiting for your breaks to come. It just doesn’t happen that way; successful people create their breaks. While you need not take on the whole world at once, it is on you to do something every day to propel yourself closer to making your desires a reality. I am sure you have heard the saying, “A thousand-mile journey begins with a single step”. Even if planning to travel by bus, plane, car, or train these days, you must take the first step. Each step will bring you nearer to your destination.
Here are some suggestions that you may find helpful in your effort to create your breaks no matter the destination.
Get it done. Work on some aspect of making your dream come true every day. Create a list of tasks you need to accomplish within a specific time frame. No matter how big or small the task – get it done! Set aside time on your schedule to complete them. If not on your schedule, they are most likely not going to get done. Out of sight, out of mind. Keep what you want to achieve on the radar.
Eliminate false beliefs. Self-imposed negative belief systems can become major obstacles to your desire to get more out of life. Beliefs such as “I don’t have what it takes”, “I don’t have enough money to get started”, “they won’t let me” or “the time isn’t right” will only hold you hostage to low expectations; limiting your ability to rise to the next level. These beliefs are often the results of our upbringing, culture, and experiences. Remember, nothing can prevent your dreams from coming true, but you.
Take a chance. To reach the next level requires courage. Opportunities are all around you if you are willing to step into the unknown. There are no guarantees in life, so you must have confidence in what you want to accomplish. I recently listened to Sylvester Stallone talk about how he turned down $300,000 for the rights to his screenplay to the first Rocky film when he was so broke that he had to sell his beloved dog. We are all aware of his success story many years later. You can play it safe and watch life pass you by or you can overcome your fears and step into the unknown.
Tune out the noise. You must be mentally tough to pursue your dreams until they become real. There will be self-doubt and doubters all round you. You will experience setbacks that make you call your decisions into question. These are the times in which you must tune out the voices in your head telling you to, “quit now”, “you don’t have what it takes” or “you will never make it”. We all hear these voices at one time or another. It’s only a test to determine how serious you are about reaching your goals. Don’t become distracted by them and stay focused.
Stay in the game. You cannot win sitting on the side lines. Success requires that you stay into the game of life and compete. Don’t let the ups and downs of life discourage you. Yes, the rules of engagement will often change, but don’t let that scare you from the competition. Life demands that you be flexible and embrace the changes. You win some and lose some; keep showing up ready to compete. To stay in the game requires a high level of self-confidence. Therefore, you must believe in your ability to compete and win.
Work on your craft. Success is often the result of many hours, days, and years of preparation for just the right moment. It requires that you work on your craft and sharpen your skills to be ready. You never know how and when the right opportunity is going to come your way. What might appear to be a small act could turn out to be a life changing event. You never know who might be watching or how one moment will transform into something greater. Luck only leads to success when preparation meets opportunity.
Make an investment. Nothing in life is free. Anything worth having has a cost. You must be willing to invest a significant amount of your time and resources to achieve your dreams. Only you can determine the amount of effort and energy required to reach your desired destination. If what you’re doing now is not producing desired results, it’s not enough. Do whatever it takes to achieve success.
I leave you with these final words of encouragement. Dare to dream on and expect to succeed. Don’t get caught up in self-imposed limitations. Think big and work hard to create your breaks. As you travel the road to success, I hope you discover that the impossible has just become a little bit more possible. Your breaks are waiting for you.
Written by Dr. RL Kight for Mind Power Solutions. Visit www.mindpowersolutions.com to learn more about our personal development and training services.